one-eyed flipping it out

wow. almost a month since i last updated. my readership has fell 4-fold, and well i guess i was waiting for it to hit 0 before i started blogging again (no, really.) but come to think of it, what does “no, really” mean? does it mean that it is really no, or does it mean that it is really yes? then again, it does not matter cause people will read the line and skip over the brackets, cause that is the function of brackets. no, but then again the function of brackets is to do multiplication, so now i wonder what the heck is againtimesnoreally.

my gosh my stream of consciousness is killing me.

anyway. i guess i still have not been inspired in the way to blog like i used to, might be related to the fact that i am not taking philosophy classes this semester. come to think of it, i have been in constant contact with philosophy since rgs days, and it progressed to ki in jc but yeah, i guess it has really been some time since i last touched philosophy. i miss it. i wonder if it is why i sometimes get headaches during discussions, almost as if my head hurts cause i over-exerted my mind. but then again is body and mind separable? i am totally drunk from bubble tea. i hope it is certainly not because my brain is rusty or something, i do not want it to be! ): so now i am thinking it is probably because of the lack of ventilation in the rooms on berkeley campus, i wonder why the design is such. especially since it is not like they have airconditioning too.

berkeley’s been pretty interesting so far, i think i am liking it here. but the thing is that i feel it is almost like singapore plus dirty and cracked streets and weed and alcohol, because of the majority of asians and minority of ang mohs. it feels almost unnatural to refer to them as caucasians. shoot this blog address is on my facebook account which so many of them live on, but it is okay since i am not much of a known existence in berkeley anyway haha! on the social hierarchy, i must be down there with the squirrels. whee!

today i was thinking about the creation of study groups – i have never really got the concept actually. to tell the truth, i have never been in a study group. (oh no such a loser) but the other truth is that i just like to study alone! and like js and wy and i may sometimes sit together in the rj library, but that’s not considered as study group cause we are not doing the same stuff and not like discussing a certain topic. we hardly ask one another questions too! but all this is under my assumption of what study groups are like. and we do not ever ask one another to go out and study together, the concept is just freaking foreign to us. (ARGH I TOTALLY WANT TO STOP ADDING BRACKETS BUT I CAN’T HELP IT – “us” keeps reminding me of “US” – ARGH)

so i was thinking that study groups are such funny things. i was thinking that cause study groups are so popular in college. if i remember correctly, one of the rg teachers did tell us that it is impossible to self-study in college, and to do well, you better like get together a study group and do different parts of a certain set of notes and share it. it seems almost impossible to survive without a study group in college! (alas i do not have a study group yet and midterms wave is here!)

it is funny because when you form a study group, you want to form it with someone who is obviously smarter/more well read/more observant/__________ (enter your superlative here) than you, and that superlative will almost never be “less bright” or “less dilligent” unless you are a narcissistic freak. or you just sincerely want to help your peers.

so A would want to study with B cause B > A, but B would want to study with C cause C > B and so on. and B would not want to study with A, cause that is not really beneficial to B, and C would not want to study with B cause C would rather study with D. now the question would be why is A not choosing to study with D – i certainly do not know, but i do know that the pattern continues until you reach the smartest girl/guy in the class.

i think the solution to the problem would be for everyone to study together, but that will be really difficult in a class of 20. and actually that does not solve the problem cause there is still the smartest person in the group who will be sad.

so study groups are a funny thing.

but actually i don’t know – choose someone who is at the same level as you? but why do that if you can choose someone smarter than you, except for the fact that he/she will probably not choose you unless they have problems saying no. but then one would feel bad cause one is forcing him/her to waste his/her time.

ah okay i think i am oversimplifying the situation – too much econs lol.

i guess i will understand it when i finally have a study group, if ever.